up and down and up and down. And down.

The first blood test results are in.  B is on a 200 dose of puregon.  Her day 6 bloods slowed an estrogen level of under 150.  Those of you playing along at home will know that this does not bode well.  The doctor has upped her dose to 400 and will do repeat bloods on Tuesday.  No need for ultrasound before then, as there will be nothing to see.  No one told her what this means.  I had to tell her this morning that she needed to be prepared for the cycle to be cancelled if the estrogen didn’t rise soon.  She is in shock, I think.  Poor thing.  This process takes such a toll, and lack of real communication is a key factor in that.

M, our surrogate, whom they also put on puregon, has a level of 270 at day 6.  This is also quite low, so they have upped her from 50 to 100, no ultrasound yet and a repeat blood on Tuesday.  I remember being put on puregon for a transfer cycle and not responding well either (even at 300, I think).  This is why I wanted the clinic to use gonal F.  But I’m not a doctor, I don’t know how anyone else will respond to that drug, so I can’t really call the shots.  But I guess we are seeing now how they react to puregon, and it isn’t great.  Ahhh hindsight.

How do I feel?  Well, kind of not surprised.  I know there are people who think it must be in the bag now I have an egg donor and a surrogate.  But I know that something can go wrong every step of the way, and it is not at all surprising to me that it is going wrong at the first step.

I also know that it’s not over til the fat lady sings, and that hearing the blood results Tuesday or Wednesday will give us a more definitive answer.  I know we are not out of the race yet, and I also know that the chances of this cycle being cancelled are higher than it going ahead.  I don’t have a crystal ball.  It will be what it is, and there is nothing I can do about that.  I am not going to ruminate over it.  But my period is also due on Wednesday, so I think I better be prepared for a bit of a meltdown.

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