A little ray of sunshine

Got an envelope from my clinic in the mail today. Scared to open it, knowing it was probably going to give me the results of our surrogacy application, and not being able to take any more bad news right now. But I summoned the courage and glad I did: APPROVED!

So now I just have to hope that I am not going for surgery the day we are booked for our final counselling session (June 13th), because if we had to reschedule that we’d be another month or two behind- they are fully booked for ages in advance. I really want an August cycle. Pretty please…. Can’t wait to tell everyone about the surrogacy news. Think I will wait until tomorrow, then tell DH both sets of news, then let everyone else know. So if you happen to know my friends/family IRL, please don’t mention any of this just now.

I am so relieved that something is finally going right. Having this to think about is going to help me get through the next two days, and then telling DH will help me get through the next two weeks. I am feeling like this is an ectopic. Would love to be wrong. But those pee sticks are not getting any darker, and I am 17dpo, and my temps are back down to 36.8, and I have twinges on my right side. So.

Today I am minding a local second hand clothes shop for the first time (owner can’t get a baby sitter). I hope I am not too bored, sitting on a chair in a small room all day. Also, I am hopeless as a sales person. She probably won’t ask me back. Oh well. I don’t really want a regular job anyway so I guess I’m not bothered. The money is crap, but I might swap it for some of her clothes. I’m taking a book to read, and my ipod to put in her docking station because I’m sick of hearing her music. I am going to have to work very hard to stay nice and cheerful and not snap at anyone today, given my frame of mind. Perhaps it will be good for me.

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